A New Creature. . . an Apostolic Pentecostal blog

Chapter 3 Job 3:1-26 (KJV) 1 After this opened Job his mouth, and cursed his day. Job after the seven days of silence from his friends, after long meditations on his state of affairs, he cursed the day of his birth.  Job was certainly not a rash man.  He was not unaware of words, or impact of his words.  To curse. . . the Hebrew word can mean and is occasionally translated as to revile, or despise. Only God can truly curse something.  We are given no such power.  It is a measure of Job's pain, that after living a life measured in decades, which can only be viewed as hugely blessed that he was brought so low, in such an apparently short time. 2 And Job spake, and said, 3 Let the day perish wherein I was born, and the night in which it was said, There is a man child conceived.  What was long looked upon as a day of celebration, for in  those days male children were valued more than female, what started out as a day of celebration for his parents, Jo...

I've been in the midst of my twice yearly spring/fall episodic depression.  This fall installment started early.  It is typically arriving in October.  This year it arrived somewhere in the middle of September.  I can only ever detect its coming in hindsight.  It dawns upon me like some dark day. I am very much in the depths right now, maybe as low as I have ever gone.  It is difficult to do anything.  Getting out of bed and going to work is a victory maybe unknown to most.  I prayed today for God to make a way for me to go on an extended road trip.  I greatly desire to be carried in the close womb of a car driving down the road for hour upon hour.  Buckled tightly in the seat, gripping the steering wheel with steely hands, as the long miles pass beneath the wheels of my rolling ark of salvation. . . cruise control set, all I have to do is to keep the car upon the road as I meditate and pray. Those who know me, know me as one passionate about life and as giving myself fully to anyt...

Turn the Page. . . Another day passes. . . another month begins. . . tear off the old calendar sheet. Look at the fresh picture on the new month's page. . .To most the beginning of a new month means a new cycle of bills begin. . .possibly a monthly income check arrives, but not much else. For me though, the landscape of my year is not a plain, but rather two plateaus with two valleys of varying and unpredictable depth between them. October and March are my months of depression. I've written past entries on my seasonal battle with darkness, but each year it seems to catch me unaware of its arrival. This year it has started early. It was maybe 10 days ago (only seen looking backward) that it began this year. Jackie could probably pinpoint the day better than I. My most noticeable symptom is increased irritability. I become very critical. Lots of things bother me that normally I would give no thought to. Life becomes very much less fun. I have trouble finding anything t...